Friday, September 28, 2012

Feeling lost

Morning ladies.

I regret to inform you that I am not my usual, witty scribe today.  I have had a not-so fantastic week and I am feeling a little lost.  I pride myself in my ability to stay positive, not to worry, and to dig down deep and find strength you didn't know you had.  The whole time we were trying to conceive, and then Sully's surgeries, we always lived by the saying, "You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only option."  Well, that is true... but I am feeling very overwhelmed.

Warning: Pity Party about to commence.

We have one outstanding bill left with Children's.  Granted, the bill is only $1,500 and that is minuscule compared to what we could have paid, but it is $1,500 that we just don't have right now.  I tried to work out a payment plan with them yesterday, but they won't take anything less than $100 a month, and I just can't do that.  After basically stifling my cries talking to the payment department, I ended the call and sat and cried in my office.  A short while later, I got a call from another financial guy and he says to me, "Wow, you guys have been through a lot, huh?"  Um.. is that all you called me for?!  You don't think I know that!?  He must have sensed that I was really not in the mood, so he back tracked and said that he wants to see if there is any more help they can give us on the bill.  Also, he said that just because Children's won't set up an officially payment plan, as long as we send something, they won't send the bill to collections.  I guess that is a piece of good news.  Robert and I have worked hard for our perfect credit and I am really not inclined to flush it down the drain.

My other pea under my mattress is Sully's doctor wants us to meet with a PT next month if Sully isn't cruising.  Now, Sully is not yet "pulling up" to stand and cruising.  He crawls, sits, talks like an 18 month old, and everything else, but the doctor wants him pulling up.  While I understand that yes, perhaps he *should* be doing those things, do people forget that he had to spend 6 weeks with limited mobility TWICE?!  How about we take a sawzall and cut your breast plate open not once, but two times, and then see how good you feel!  For everything he has been through, Sully is a freakin' champ! I know I shouldn't let it get to me, but it did. We basically have a month to get him to pull up of some physical therapist is going to come in and "access" him.  Ya know, I want people to just leave my child alone.  I really do. 

Also, I don't want to be a hypocrite, because I tell people all the time not to worry about it so I am just going to say, MONEY SUCKS.

Lastly, to end my crap-tastic day yesterday, I came home to a water main break on my street and no water!  Yep.. awesome.  No water until the MORNING.  I had to send Robert to the grocery store to grab a couple gallons of drinking/hand washing/teeth brushing water and some organic food pouches for Sully.  I was planning on making Sully food last night, but that was not gonna happen.  I ended up putting Sully to bed and then crying in my bed for a good twenty minutes before passing out cold at about 8:30pm.

Thank goodness it's Friday.  I need a break. 

Thanks for putting up with the vent.  I needed it.


Friday, September 21, 2012

Fantastic Friday!

Hello and good day!  How are we all doing?  Once again, I lost track of time yesterday.  Lame, I know. Before I get to the goods, I just have to vent a second.  Mr. Sully James is getting FOUR teeth cutting through on the top.  He is kind of being a bear.  I mean, really?  Poor kid is healing from a circumcision and now four stinkin' teeth are coming through.  ::Ugh::  He is still going to bed without too much complaint and he sleeps like a rock and then BOOM!  At 2am or so, he is up, super crabby, and wants to drink a bottle.  All the books I have read and doctors say to let them cry for a little bit and go back to sleep.  Well, I let him cry for 10 minutes or so (and it wasn't a full on cry, more like whining) and then he must have dozed off again.   I tried to go back to sleep and about 15 minutes later, Sully was back at it again.  I got out of bed and gave him a bottle.  He went back to bed and slept the rest of the night.  By the time I tried to go back to sleep it was after 3am and Robert was snoring like a chainsaw.  I barely slept anymore and then my alarm went off at 5am.  Then, as I sleepily made my way to the bathroom, I stubbed by baby toe and ring toe on the corner of my bedroom door.  I swore like I sailor under my breath and wanted to tear the door off. 

Anyone have any tips for a teething boy?  We are letting him chew on washcloths and basically anything that it safe to gnaw on.  I tried Tylenol and Anbesol, too.  I will take any ideas you have!

Well, let's get to the good stuff:

I just love this hat.  I got it on clearance at Target last week and it is so cute!  Sully looks beyond adorable in it.  We are entering winter with a gusto this week here in Minnesota so this hat is much needed now.

I am pretty much in love with the Carter's outlets.  We got Sully the cutest stuff there last week and I can't believe that he is in 12 month clothes.  Insane!  We call him out little Stinky Monster and we got him this beyond adorable outfit:

The shirt says, "Mommy's Little Monster" and then there is a monster on the butt... :-)

Yep, another one of my addictions.  They make this website so easy to use and send you so many coupons.. it is like crack.  I can't wait to make Sully's timeline for his birthday and have his photo books on display.  The latest one I did is so cute I can't even stand it.  I used lyrics from songs that I sing to Sully as the captions on the pages.  It will be here Monday.  I can't even wait.

OK, I know what you are thinking, 'Did you she really just post a cart cover?"  Yep, I did.  We actually got one as a shower gift and I thought it was so ridiculous that we returned it.  Well, hind sight is 20/20.  These are actually super handy.  My mom bought us one when Sully started sitting in high chairs at restaurants.  They work with them too.  And if your child is anything like mine, they chew on everything.. including cart handles and high chairs.  Now, I just throw this in our diaper bag and now he can chew away because he is chewing on his own stuff.  Don't mock until you use it!

The V Tech Lean N' Dance Zoo.  Warning: this toy can get extremely annoying, but Sully loves it!  The Yellow and red stick is like a joystick that makes the orange monkey dance.  The colored bars teach about animals, animal sounds and colors.  It really is an awesome toy!

Ah yes... the Cozy Truck.  Debbiemom just informed me that this is what she is getting Sully for his birthday.  I am so pumped.  He loves trucks and driving trucks so I am thinking he will love this!  And besides, it is so cute. :-)

I will leave you with a picture of my adorable Sully James intently reading his cow book:

He looks so serious. :-)

Have a great weekend!


Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Sully Update!

Hey ladies! 

Yesterday was extremely insane and I meant to post but time got away from me. I will do a Wonderful Wednesday post tomorrow to make up for my lack of Terrific Tuesday.  For now, I will update about Sully's appointment from Friday.

Well, as you remember, I was not looking forward to going without Robert to this thing.  I don't have a penis, so I was not looking forward to going to the circ.  I left work at noon on Thursday and picked up Sully from daycare. I of course forgot my nook AND formula so before I got him, I had to swing by our house, which I was not thrilled about.
Anyway, I finally get Sully and get on the road.  I was going to stop in Pine City to get gas and lunch.  Well, Mr. Sully James had other plans.  About 13 miles before Hinckley, he woke up from his nap and decided that he was hungry and wanted to scream his head off.  I was able to make to the Hinckley, which is a pretty famous halfway point between Duluth and Minneapolis.  I am pumping gas and Sully is screaming in the car.  I take him out and I go into the bathroom to change his diaper.  Just my luck, there is no changing table in the bathroom.  Awesome.  I had to lay his changing pad on the sink and then two women using the bathroom decide to forgo the silent paper towels and instead op for those deluxe dryers that blow at about 50 decibels.  So, Sully then starts crying again and doesn't stop until I get him into the car and a bottle in his mouth.  He still had a really runny nose so I am sucking that out with the Nosefrida and feeding him a bottle in the back seat of my car in a White Castle parking lot. ::ugh::

There was a bunch of construction for the second half of my trip so by the time I reached my in laws, I was frazzled and starving.  On a better note, they took us out for a nice dinner at the Tavern, shopping at Target, and then stopped at Byerley's for a Chocolate Symphony for dessert.  It was really nice.

Sully had a rough night sleep and he couldn't eat anything after midnight so that made it more difficult.  At about 9pm, I started to feel pukey.  Sully woke me up for the last time at 4am and I just figured I would get up.  I finished packing our things.  I had my mother in law hold Sully while I packed the car.  All of a sudden, I don't know if it was nerves or what, but I leaned over in the middle of the street at 5:45 and yaked.  (You've got to be kidding me!!?)
I loaded Sully in the car and we set off for the 6 block trek to Children's.  My mom and Ken were already there waiting for us.  We went to the surgery waiting room and waited for them to call us back.  While we waited, my mom pushed Sully around in a little cozy coupe and he loved it:

Sully was such a good boy!  i am sure he was hungry, but he was having too much fun playing. :-)
He went back for the circ and I cried a little.  I know it wasn't a big deal, but every time you see your child be taken into surgery, all those feelings come rushing back. The circ was only about 30 minutes and he was back, and he was STARVING!  He chugged 10 ounces and didn't even spit up!  We sat in recovery for about an hour and then he was back to his old self!  I swear, this kid is such a trooper!  We went to the CVCC floor and brought our treats.  The docs and nurses loved them.  It was nice to see everyone and they were so excited to see how perfect Sully is.

Making funny faces in the cafeteria!

We stopped at the cafeteria for a quick snack and then walked across the street to the heart clinic for our appointment with Dr. V and an echo.  Sully was getting a little angry at that time and when we weighed him, he peed everywhere! He is now almost 18lbs and 28 inches long!  He is growing like a weed! :-)
We had the echo first.  I hate that the techs can't tell us anything.  It always makes me on edge.  Then we met with Dr. V for the results of the echo.  Everything with Sully's valve is great.  He thinks it will last longer than originally thought; maybe until Sully is in 1st grade!  That is great news!  His O2 levels are perfect and everything looks great.  The only downer of the appointment is that Sully's left pulmonary artery is still a little narrow.  We knew this before and it comes with the territory of Pulmonary Atresia.  It could still grow as Sully grows, but we are going to recheck it in March and if it isn't getting wider, we will go to Children's when he is 2, stay overnight and then they will go through his groin with a balloon and stretch out that artery a little bit.  When he has his next surgery, they will put a patch on it and that will be the permanent fix.  It isn't anything bad and won't limit him or anything, it is just another procedure.  :-(  And much to my dismay, just to err on the side of caution, we are going to keep him on the blood pressure meds until March.  Oh well.  At least my boy is healthy, right?  And so damn adorable!

On our way back to Duluth on Friday, my mom and I stopped at the Carter outlet store... bad idea! :-)  $200 later, Sully has tons of new duds!  My little man is now in 12 month clothes!  Holy cow!  Where was the baby I brought home that barely fit in a newborn size? :-)

As for the rest of the weekend, we did lots of family stuff.  We went to a fall fest on Saturday and Sully rode a shuttle bus!  He loved seeing all the people.  I gave him a bite of my corn on the cob too and that was a hit. :-)  We spent Sunday watching football and hanging out with the grandparents.  It was pretty awesome.

Well, sorry that was obnoxiously long, but it was a big update!  Thanks for the support ladies!  It means a lot!


Thursday, September 13, 2012

Almost done...

Hey ladies! 

This post may be short, because I simply cannot focus.  I am getting off work at noon today, getting Sully from daycare, and then we are heading to Minneapolis.  Tomorrow morning, he is having his circ and then his LAST cardiology follow up for a YEAR.  I am so excited that I can't even stand it. Tomorrow, he also gets to be done taking medications.  He is currently only on one med, called Captopril.  It was to help keep his blood pressure low so his valve could adhere to this heart.  He has basically grown out of the dose so they are going to stop it tomorrow. 
After tomorrow, these 10 months of pure anxiety and stress will be over.  To say I am not a little scared, would be a lie.  I was extremely nauseated this morning.  I am just ready to be officially done. Not done as in, "Well we have his circ and followup in a few weeks." But done as in DONE.  After tomorrow, no more medicine, no more appointments except for his yearly exam, no more NOTHING!  We will be just completely normal.  I am so excited to put this behind us.  I am excited for them to stop poking and prodding my sweet boy.

Sully will have to be under some slight general anesthesia again, which I am not particularly pleased about, but it is for the best.  When he is asleep, they are going to give him a caudal block as well, which is a shot near his anus, sort of like an epidural, except it lasts about 8 hours.  It will also help with pain after the circ.  Nobody wants to wake up from a 20 minute surgery and have a painful wee wee.
After the circ, we will grab some lunch in the good ole' Starz cafe in the hospital and then we have an echo with Dr. V at 1:15. 

I love our team and Children's.  I really cannot say enough about them.  I have spent the entire week baking treats for them as a surprise. Last time I went down there, we made S'mores Pops and they went quick.  The night after his surgery, we went to Lund's and bough a bunch of lunch meat, cheese, crackers, hummus and buns as a snack for the nurses and they loved it!  This time, I made sugar cookies, chocolate chip cookies, chewy M & M monster bars and rice krispies.  I am going to decorate the sugar cookies tonight when I get to my in-laws. I made everything from scratch... I am pretty proud of myself.  I pride myself in my baking so it was a good time.

Well, The morning is flying by and I better close up some files and head outta here.
Send prayers and good vibes our way!  I will keep everyone posted!


Monday, September 10, 2012

25 Things You Didn't Know About Me

Good morning!  How did Monday get her so quickly again!  I had to completely change this intro because I had started this post on Friday and never got to finish... oh well.
I was reading UsWeekly and they had Michelle Obama do the 25 Things You Didn't Know About Me section and it was awesome!  She is such a class act and I adore her.  Mrs. Obama is my inspiration for today's post.  I think sometimes, us moms, especially moms that struggled, tend to focus wholly on our tots.  While that is fine and dandy, we need to remember the WOMAN that brought that child into this world.  Did you leave her behind since you got your new title?  I know that I forget about myself sometimes.  I would much rather be with Sully, or think about Sully, or talk about Sully; but I can't forget about Courtney. 
This morning, I decided to take a minute and talk about Courtney... Honesty, here we come.

25 Things You Didn't Know About CourtneyAnna

1.  I am TERRIFIED of snakes.  Not like the, "Eww gross," kind of terrified; but the run-scream-and-feel-like-I'm-gonna-die scared.  I have actually even fainted once.  I have also incited a stampede of kindergartners when a class pet that was  a four foot long gray snake, got loose in the building while I was subbing there for a month.
2.  I have a ketchup obsession.  I put it on everything. Thanksgiving turkey, chicken, Christmas ham.. love it.  I get quite a few stares..

3.  I really, really hate one of my coworkers.  I am only nice to this person to preserve the sanity here, but if given the chance to get away with it scott free... I would punch them directly in the face.

4.  I hate the word "moist."  It just grosses me out.

5.  I secretly want to be an Old Lady to one of the Sons of Anarchy.  Preferably Jax Teller.  I could be a totally bad ass.  I remember when I started watching the show on Netflix, I was pregnant with Sully and Jax's son Abel is born with a heart condition and needs surgery.  I remember thinking, "How sad!  That little baby needs heart surgery!" Little did I know... :-)

6.  I wish more people read this blog.  I feel like I have lost some people and even though I hate to admit it, it makes me sad.  I really love some of the people I have met through it and sometimes I feel unappreciated.  Maybe that is just my slight insecurities coming through.

7.  I pray for the bloggy mamas that are currently TTC, every night. :-)

8.  I am a clean freak. I hate when people leave dishes undone in the sink after dinner.  It is just gross.  It take minutes to wash a load and there is no excuse for a dirty kitchen... or a dirty bathroom... ICK!

9.  I also don't like when moms blame their kids or spending time with their kids for why their house is a sty.  Your house is a sty because you don't clean.  Unless you kid stays up until midnight, everyone can take half hour and do a quick buff of the house. 

10.  If I ever won the lottery, the first thing I would do is buy my dad tickets to see the Rolling Stones.  He has wanted to see them forever, but their tickets are so expensive.  I looked once and they were almost $200 a ticket and the show was in Chicago! 

11.  I am a sucker for stupid movies.  I love them and watch them over and over again.  Robert just shakes his head and leaves the room.  Examples, "Troop Beverly Hills," "Dad, the Angel, and Me," and 'Surf Ninjas."  I don't know what makes them so appealing.

12.  I wish I had an unlimited cash flow so I could be the "Secret Millionaire."  I can't watch that show without bawling my eyes out. 

13.  I love Facebook.  I am a Facebook creeper and there are some people that I stay friends with only so I can be a creeper.  Sad, I know, but you gotta have something that is just for entertainment right?

14.  I am an iTunes junkie.  If I had every dollar back that I have spent on iTunes, I could probably pay off my mortgage.  I don't believe in pirating music.  Since my dad is a musician, I wouldn't feel right about "stealing" music.

15.  I secretly hope my dad becomes rich and famous from his music.  He sooooo deserves it.  Listen and ENJOY!

16.  My mind is like a Rolodex for song lyrics.  For some reason, I can remember almost every lyric to every song I have ever heard.  It is weird.  My friends tell me I need to go on that game show about song lyrics.

17.  I drink Diet Coke like it is going to be outlawed. I am the freak that doesn't eat McDonald's food, but will go through the drive through just for a fountain diet coke when they have the larges for $1.  I am that weirdo.  I am currently drinking what's left of a two liter for a little jolt.

18.  I wish I had more "fun money" to get my nails, hair and eyebrows done on a consistent basis.  I am not saying I let myself go or anything because I still like to look nice, but I have completely abandoned coloring my hair and I haven't gotten my nails done since Christmas.  Every time I think about spending that much money, I always think of something I could buy Sully instead. 

19.  I secretly wish I could be a stay at home mom.  I talk about big game about working, but I would love to stay home, have a brother or sister for Sully if my uterus would cooperate, and I would cook and bake, and play with them all day.  Instead, I work full time... lame.

20.  I hate when people try to "keep up with the Jones'."  Too many times on Facebook and IRL, I see people trying to front or show off their "stuff."  I hate that.  Life is not about "stuff."  No one cares if you got new Uggs or the fanciest car... I drive a Kia... and I love it. :-)

21.  Speaking of my Kia, We have a 2008 Kia Optima.  I love it.  People made fun of us for buying a Kia but, if you look at the safety ratings and gas mileages, Bert and I are laughing all the way to the bank.  We get almost 500 miles to a tank of gas and have every safety feature available.  That is more important that a beeping back up camera or a car that will parallel park for you. 

22.  I feel like I have ADHD sometimes.  I really lose focus and end up beebopping from one thing to another.  Luckily, I always get things done.

23. I think I take on too much.  I have a hard time saying, "no" to people.  I am the coordinator of multiple charity events and my weekends are usually full.  Sometimes I wish I could say, "no" without guilt and spend the entire weekend in my jammies.

24.  I am ADDICTED to Shutterfly.  Here is another avenue that I could spend a billion dollars. It doesn't help my addiction when they keep sending me these amazing coupons.  You can't pass up a free photobook, right?

25.  ..... I am totally going to go on Shutterfly and order a photobook... damn you and your amazing coupons!  I am such a sucker for a good coupon!

I hope you enjoyed this post as much as I enjoyed writing it.  Have a great week ladies!


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Wonderful Wednesday!

Hello there!  I was so excited to see the positive reaction to yesterday's post.  It warms my heart knowing that it made people feel better.  That is one thing I am loving today! :-)

I am slightly pressed for time today... shocker.  I swear, every week, I tell myself, "This week will finally be the week that things slow down.  This week I will relax and not run around like a chicken with my head cut off." Yet, every week, I run myself ragged.  I am hoping for a slow down, but there really isn't one in sight. Luckily I have my other bloggy mamas to give me those few minutes of calm while I read their posts. :-)
Anyhow, this is what I am lovin' this week:

The Sharpie Accent Highlighter... OBSESSED.   For someone as anal retentive as I am, this thing rocks.  I have Sully's medical binder highlighted everywhere and I use this at work every day.  I run them down to the nub.  I just got a GIANT box of them from our business supply place and I can't wait to highlight everything that comes into the office.

I love this brand of clothing!  I didn't really know what it was until I had picked up a few for Sully at the Munchkin Markets (more on that next...)  They have the cutest clothes!  I got one for Sully that has a construction crane on it that says, "My Mom Digs Me."  How cute is that!?

Oh for the love of the Markets!  When I was pregnant, my friend turned me on to the Munchkin Markets.  They are all over the country and basically what it is is a bunch of moms getting together and having a huge consignment sale.  You can't sell anything broken or stained.  It all has to be nice condition.  It has about a billion articles of clothing, toys, strollers, and basically anything you could need for your little fart blossom. I get a ton of Sully's clothes there.  They grow so fast and everything is so expensive nowadays that it is nice to get a good deal!  And, you can sell your stuff there too!  I sold a few items at the spring Market, but I am planning on selling a lot more this time!  I am finally going to go through Sully's clothes.  There are a few things I plan on keeping for sentimental reasons and then a few outfits in case we have another baby someday, but other than that, out the door they go!  I am going to use the Market money for Sully's party.  If you sell, you get 65% of your proceeds!  It is a win win! 

This oatmeal rocks!  I usually miss the oats myself, but Sully has never really dug the texture, but he loves oatmeal.  I was looking at alternatives and I found this.  Sully loves it!  The texture is more smooth and it is delicious.  I sometimes add maple and cinnamon or fruit for an extra kick. :-)

The people I love the most: My hubby and Sully!  How cute are they?  This is right before we went to the carnival on Sunday in Hinckley.  ::Note Sully's adorable red board shorts in the background... so cute!::
I just love them.  Every time I am having a crappy day or I am just feeling stressed, I look at my handsome, happy boys and all is right with the world. :-)

I will leave you with a couple more uber cute Sully James pics:

Having a snack!

Oh ya know... just sitting in the recliner... brushing my teeth... like you do... :-)

Have a great Wednesday!


Tuesday, September 4, 2012

That Matthew, he is one smart cookie.

Good morning!  I hope everyone had a fantastic weekend!  We sure did!  I realize that it is Tuesday and I should be writing a Terrific Tuesday post, but I feel like this one needs to be written more.  I do in fact have a lot of things I am loving this week so I will swap out Terrific Tuesday for a Wonderful Wednesday. :-)

Anyhow, lately I have been checking in on my blog girls, like I do every day, and I have been noticing a ton of worry.  Some range from minor worries that I find a normal part of life for an IF mom, and then there are giant, life changing worries.  Either way, I am seeing all these worries wear on my confidantes.  I can almost feel the pressure they are under and the stress they are feeling.  It completely bums be out.  I know how much things can weigh on your mind.

I have suffered from anxiety my whole life. That crazy bitch IF only made it worse and then of course, two open heart surgeries on my newborn didn't exactly lighten the load.  My faith had been shaken during the TTC process, but after God answered my prayers with Sullivan, I knew I wasn't alone.  Now, I am not some kind of bible-thumper or put my hand on your forehead and rid you of any demons, but I do have a very strong faith. That faith has gotten me through some tough times; tougher than most people see in a lifetime.  It is a comfort knowing that someone always has your back.  I can promise you, He is always watching. :-)

On a particularly bad and stressful day towards the end of my pregnancy, I had emailed my dad and told him how worried I was about money.  How would we pay this bill?  What if we couldn't afford diapers?  What if he needed more clothes than what we had gotten for him?  Sometimes these worries were those of an irrational, pregnant mind, but they were valid to me at the time.  Little did we know what kind of bills were coming down the pike... hahaha.
Anyway, my dad emailed me the perfect solution.  This is what his email said,


Read Matthew 6:25-34.  You'll feel better.

Love you,


Part of me was angry that I had reached out for advice and comfort, and now I had to go on a biblical scavenger hunt.  Being in no mood to track this verse down, but not really having a choice, I did as I was instructed. 
As soon as I reached the passage, I knew exactly why my dad sent me there. 

"25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Matthew was right.  He kind of hit the nail on the head.  Why in the hell was I worrying?  Was me stewing at my desk going to help anything?  Um.. no.  Was I magically going to make more money or was trouble just going to stop bothering me because I was worried?  Yea... that would be no again. No matter what I did in my life, worrying was pointless. It wasn't going to change the situation.

Don't get me wrong; I can still worry with the best of them, but I don't let it consume me anymore.  I don't let it be the focal point of my life.  I needed a reminder of this after Sully's second surgery.  I feel so much better now.  Thanks for the reality check, Matt... you're a pretty wise cat.

If only one person reads this and finds comfort, I will be happy.  Take a deep breath.  Let it out.  Drop the worry.  Inhale goodness. 

This too shall pass.