A club

I haven't been the diligent blogger I wish I was, but I am trying.  Life always gets going and we get caught in the swirl.  Though I have tons of things I was to write about, talk about, share, I often have trouble getting them to come out in cohesive sentences.

One thing that has been on my mind lately is my other blog ladies.  Ya know, we all came here, looking for comfort and a place to vent about why in the H - E- Double Hockey Sticks our bodies and uteruses wouldn't cooperate with us. We were scared/hopeful/beaten down/sad/mad/tired/frustrated/hurt.  Luck for us, we found a whole group and support system in each other. 
We have cheered the good times, and stuck together in the bad times.  We've prayed, cried, laughed, yelled, cheered, encouraged, and rooted on our fellow IF sisters.  I know that I have compulsively checked blogs when I knew one of my girls was having a big appointment, or waiting for news.  Then when the webpage opens and you see that awesome news you were hoping to see, you feel that rush of happiness and excitement, just like with a "real" friend. 

It seems so funny to think that we are all so vested in each other and, I feel, that we genuinely care about what is happening to the other one, yet, we will probably never even meet.  Our kids won't play together, we won't grab a coffee, but still, there is that deep rooted sense of camaraderie that I don't know that anyone else could provide.  It is intensely comforting to know that someone has your back.  Everyone in our lives tells us, "I know how you feel."  It is almost a robotic response that must be programmed into people, but to have a group of women that can say, "I actually know EXACTLY how you feel,"  is something that I never take for granted.

We have kind of formed this little "club" of sorts.  I mean, let's face it, no one really wants to join this club, but if Mother Nature forces someone to join our ranks, at least we have each other, right?

I don't really know what prompted this lovefest of a post, but I think I am feeling so grateful.  One of the blogs I follow is Heather.  I have followed her for a while and she is just awesome.  She was really encouraging during Sully's surgeries, and she herself has a pretty handsome little guy. Last week, she blogged about another If-er named Bridget.  Bridget had just given birth to a wonderful little boy and shortly after his birth, they discovered he had an internal hernia of sorts (I am blanking on the medical terminology) but there was a hole in his diaphragm and part of his bowels were in his abdominal area.  It is treatable with surgery, but he had to be taken to a Children's hospital and have surgery at only a couple days old.  Deja Vu right?!  Reading this, all the feelings from Sully's life flight and his surgeries came flooding back.  After finding so much solace in others, it was MY turn to be able to say, "I know EXACTLY how you feel."  To simply say that something like that is terrifying, would be the understatement of the year.  Handing your child off to a group of doctors, knowing they are going to cut his tiny little body, it the worst feeling in the world. 
I am happy to report that little baby Gavin went through surgery like a champ and is recuperating nicely.  Kids are so resilient.  Really.  They can bounce back a million times better than adults.
I also follow a blogger named Katharine.  I swear, I watch her posts like a hawk! Haha!  Katharine has been TTC and then TTCAL for years now.  She did the IUI and clomid and everything else.  In November, she prepped for her first IVF.  The docs implanted 3 embabies, and after getting a BFP, they were excited!
A few days later at her beta recheck, she was told her betas were not doubling, and to prepare for yet another miscarriage.  When she posted about it, my heart broke right along with her.  I'll admit it, I cried.  I felt so terrible and I knew how she felt.  I know that pang and yearning for a baby.  Those thoughts that consume your every minute.  I remember feeling so badly.  Then, a miracle came.
A few days later, she went to the doctor to have more blood work, they pulled a Beta, and BAM.  They had more than doubled!  Apparently, 2 of the embabies had attached, and one had not stayed attached, but there was one embaby still hanging on!  It is nothing short of miraculous.  Katharine is now 14 weeks 1 day and I am so excited for that I can barely stand it.  She had an appt with and MFM and they had an ultrasound.  They got to see the little bambino swimming around, and sucking her thumb.  Oh, Her?  Did I say, "her?"  Yep, the doc was able to see that Katharine's little offspring didn't appear to be growing any family jewels, so they are fairly certain that they will be having a lot of pink in their future. :-)  I can't wait to see this little one!

While I am showing love to my ladies, I wanna say a big congratulations to Valerie on the birth of her newest hatchling!  Baby CeCe was born January 25, 2013 weighing a very healthy 11 lbs 1 oz!  Woohoo!  Welcome to the world CeCe!

We got another gal, our SAHA (Stay at Home Attorney), who has been battling massive sleep issues with her daughter, E.  Anyone have advice or ideas?  They are trying to sleep train and E is quite the little stinker.

I guess all I am trying to say is that I appreciate and am grateful for all of you.  When you cry, we cry.  When you have joy, we feel that joy for you.  You will always have someone here, and I just want you to know that.

I await your posts. :-)

Thoughts, prayers, and good vibes,

CourtneyAnna